Divide & Conquer Sam's Thoughts
by Irelandfaith1118
Summary: Reposted as 2 chapters - Sam's pov and Jack's Pov Short story of what Sam was thinking behind the shield and what I think should of happened after the shield lifted
1. Chapter 1

Sam's thoughts – Tag to Upgrades & Divide and Conquer

I saw the look on your face. The frustration as the realization dawned on you that you were going to have to break your one rule and leave me. I heard the rod as it beat against the lock compartment and I watched you as you tore the door off and then you beat inside. Hoping, begging, praying that somehow somewhere there was someone who would listen to you. Hear you when you cried out to save someone from dying. You had lost a son because you felt no one had listen, was it going to be the same this time? Would no one hear your pleas, your crying anguish to save someone else you loved?

Yes, now I know. I didn't before. Oh I had hints but nothing positive. I thought that maybe there was something there, something that you were trying to hide as much as I was. But now it is out in the open. You stop hitting on the stupid mechanism long enough to scream "NO!" at me when I beg you to just go. Not because you are mad at me, but because you are mad at whatever fate keeps putting you in these spots. You don't want to leave me because you have figured out that I mean more to you then just another soldier under your command and I get that, I really do. But you must understand that I cannot allow you to stay here and die just because you cannot free me. Leave and come back – you will find a way to free me. That's what you do – that's what you are good at and you have proved that over and over.

Jack please, leave! Don't die because of me – leave and live your life because of me. Only then will I know how much you love me!

Wait! I feel you – you are here and you are holding me! I feel safe with my head on your shoulder and your face in my neck. We run with all we have in us but we feel lighter than we have in a long time. We know now that we can fight the war with the thought that one day, when all the fighting is over you will be mine and I will be yours – forever – no more hiding from the world – no more hiding from each other!

For that day I wait and I know that you will also – always!


	2. Chapter 2

Jack's thoughts – tag to Upgrades & Divide and Conquer

I watch your face as the tears stream down them. You are begging me to leave you. You are telling me that I can come back for you. I hear you over my pounding heart but I am not obeying you. There is no way I am leaving you behind. I don't leave people behind and I damn sure am not going to leave you behind. I thought you knew me better than that Carter.

I beat on the blasted lock but nothing is happening. I pray, I beg – but nothing is happening. Isn't there anyone out there in the whole freaking universe that cares about what I want. Why is it I feel as if I am always constantly fighting a battle to keep those I love alive. There I said it. Just like the rules and regulations that we have to follow everyday – this blasted shield is keeping me from the one I love – I have loved you since you walked into the briefing room that day with that chip on your shoulder and admitted that you played with astronaut dolls. But I will not let this shield stop me from having you. I may have to follow my command but no alien device is going to stop me!

I look straight into your tear filled blue seas and I say it – NO! I will not leave you behind. I may have to hide my feelings from the world but I will no longer hide them from you. I will not watch someone else I love die or wish to die because of something I did. I should have told that snake head to keep the dang things and go back to her planet with them. I should have known there would be consequences and I should have known I would not be the one hurt – no instead I always have to watch.

Well it's not going to happen this time. I will blow up with you, Samantha. You will not leave me here to live a life without you. How could you ask me to do that? Don't you realize that until you came into my life I had nothing. I was living just to exist. Daniel will tell you – he knows. I will not leave here and live. It won't happen. Oh my Carter – please don't beg me to do that. Please understand what I am saying I cannot go on without you. I know we have to hide it but knowing you are beside me I can handle that – don't make me chose between leaving here and leaving you or dying here with you because either way – I will die.

I feel you! You are safe! We don't have long before they are almost to us but I hold you for just a brief minute and feel your heart beating against mine. And even though I never thought I ever would or could again, I look up towards the heavens and thank the one person who could have saved you for me. I will hold you closer to me each time we leave and I hear the gate turning. I will hold you closer to me each time we walk back down the ramp and one day I will get to hold you close to me all night long.

Until than my Carter – my Samantha – remember I love you – always.


End file.
